The Rittenhouse Review

A Philadelphia Journal of Politics, Finance, Ethics, and Culture


Monday, March 03, 2003  

LYSISTRATA
A Third Excerpt

(See "The Lysistrata Project: Reading -- and Taking Action -- for Peace," March 1.)

Lysistrata Explains Woman's Interest in the Ways of War

MAGISTRATE
And how, pray, would you propose to restore peace and order in all the countries of Greece?
LYSISTRATA
It's the easiest thing in the world!
MAGISTRATE
Come, tell us how; I am curious to know.
LYSISTRATA
when we are winding thread, and it is tangled, we pass the spool across and through the skein, now this way, now that way; even so, to finish of the war, we shall send embassies hither and thither and everywhere, to disentangle matters.
MAGISTRATE
And is it with your yarn, and your skeins, and your spools, you think to appease so many bitter enmities, you silly women?
LYSISTRATA
If only you had common sense, you would always do in politics the same as we do with our yarn.
MAGISTRATE
Come, how is that, eh?
LYSISTRATA
First we wash the yarn to separate the grease and filth; do the same with all bad citizens, sort them out and drive them forth with rods-they're the refuse of the city. Then for all such as come crowding up in search of employments and offices, we must card them thoroughly; then, to bring them all to the same standard, pitch them pell-mell into the same basket, resident aliens or no, allies, debtors to the State, all mixed up together. Then as for our Colonies, you must think of them as so many isolated hanks; find the ends of the separate threads, draw them to a centre here, wind them into one, make one great hank of the lot, out of which the public can weave itself a good, stout tunic.
MAGISTRATE
Is it not a sin and a shame to see them carding and winding the State, these women who have neither art nor part in the burdens of the war?
LYSISTRATA
What! Wretched man! Why, it's a far heavier burden to us than to you. In the first place, we bear sons who go off to fight far away from Athens.
MAGISTRATE
Enough said! do not recall sad and sorry memories!
LYSISTRATA
Then secondly, instead of enjoying the pleasures of love and making the best of our youth and beauty, we are left to languish far from our husbands, who are all with the army. But say no more of ourselves; what afflicts me is to see our girls growing old in lonely grief.
MAGISTRATE
Don't the men grow old too?
LYSISTRATA
That is not the same thing. When the soldier returns from the wars, even though he has white hair, he very soon finds a young wife. But a woman has only one summer; if she does not make hay while the sun shines, no one will afterwards have anything to say to her, and she spends her days consulting oracles that never send her a husband.

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