If you find yourself completely and hopelessly bored and alone on Tuesday, head over to the home of the Union League of Philadelphia, 140 S. Broad St., for a timely program sponsored by the World Affairs Council of Philadelphia, "Red vs. Blue: Two Leading Thinkers Discuss a Divided America," a chat of some sort involving a pair of Martin Peretz proteges -- and that's not a compliment -- Peter Beinart and Andrew Sullivan, a couple of thinkin' guys who are probably just as happy to talk about anything other than their gung-ho support of the war on Iraq.

The W.A.C. says the program will be moderated by Chris Satullo, whom the council indentifies as a "columnist" for the Philadelphia Inquirer, even though he is the newspaper's editorial page editor, a bit of a step up even if in that slot he hasn't (yet) banged out an impressive bestseller about a slobbering dog that any otherwise sane person would have shipped to the pound 'round about week three.

As for the potential impact on your wallet, think nothing of it! For both the dinner and the program, the evening will cost a mere $65 for members (N.B.: That's over and above the sixty bucks, minimum, you shelled out last year to join the frat.) and $75 for non-members (references being to membership in W.A.C., I assume, and not the Union League). If you're just there to gawk at Peter and Andy, whether on a full stomach or not, it's 20 bucks or some kind of "pass" for members, and 25 dollars for peon-type non-members.

Sounds steep? Well, it's going to be an evening jam-packed with activities, with the W.A.C. offering this imprezzzzzive schedule:

5:30 p.m. Registration
6:00 p.m. Program
7:15 p.m. Book signing
7:45 p.m. Dinner
9:00 p.m. Adjournment

I think there might even be face painting for the kids!

Finally, the W.A.C. helpfully advises "business attire required," and warns, "please enter through Sansom Street," which I think is the club's servants entrance.

I'm sorry I won't see you there. I have, well, I have a thing that night.

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