The Rittenhouse Review

A Philadelphia Journal of Politics, Finance, Ethics, and Culture

Wednesday, October 15, 2003  

The Things Right Wingers Get Away With

I wonder what would happen if I were to write and have published an essay that began like this:

It’s the most wonderful week of the year. If you’re Jewish. And annoying.

It’s “Be Jewish Week” at universities all across the matzoed plains. Throughout the country, students are sharing their Hebraic proclivities. Colleges sponsor Jewish rallies. They put out “pro-tolerance” fliers. They hang gigantic banners on telephone poles and wires surrounding major cities in honor of those who are brave enough to tell us the difference between fleishig and milchig.

Here’s a piece of news for proponents of Be Jewish Week: None of the rest of us care. We don’t care which day you consider the sabbath and how much you paid for your synagogue seats. You can parade around in your yarmulkes as much as you please. You can hold as many mikvahs as you want. You can wear shirts reading “Jesus is a Phoney.” You can wear a star of David on your backpack. Just don’t expect us to care.

I’m not sure what would happen, but I bet I wouldn’t be a columnist for any reputable organization by the end of the day. But then again, the above is an almost word-for-word parody, if you will, of tripe published today at, so, in the end, what does it matter?

(See also: TBogg and World O’ Crap.)

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