Welcome to "Friday Fun," the much-anticipated and supposed-to-be-weekly feature of The Rittenhouse Review that offers a quick look at just some of the searches that brought visitors to the blog during the past week.

What, you were expecting something really lame like "Friday Cat Blogging"?

denim jacket with jeans
Denim over and above denim: Always the wrong choice. It's all a little "matchy," don't you think? But if you must, make sure the jacket is darker than the pants. Trust me on this one.

concert review phil collins wachovia, philadelphia, pa
Just the thought, the mere possibility, that I had ever blogged about Phil Collins sent me to the archives with a fit of nausea. I need to trust myself more: I've done no such thing.

where is the mtv real world house in philadelphia
Not that it matters anymore since the "Realies" have left Philadelphia, but the house in which they lived, once a bank and subsequently the local base of the Seamen's Church Institute (since moved on), is located at the northeast corner of Third and Arch Streets. Just ask Jessica Pressler. She has, um, like, "a friend," who snuck in there and took pictures and everything.

rittenhouse square plastic surgeons
Oh, Arlen, please! We've discussed this in the past. As I told you before, it's far too close to election day for yet another procedure.

best place for children's birthday parties in philadelphia
Here's a tip from thousands of Philadelphians: The best place for your kid's birthday party is in your own home.

gossip on prince charles and camille [sic]
I have nothing on this, even though Camille is a fellow Philadelphian. Just think: The Prince and the Paglia. Good God, the mind reels. (Actually, I assume the searcher had the name "Camilla" in mind.)

scranton, pa discreet
Tell me about it. I dated that once. For three largely happy years.

good evening ladies and gentlemen i earned this award (hotel annual speech for staff award)
Hmm . . . Sally Field? Meryl Streep? Henry Kissinger?

muslims faces terrorism in new york city wearing a turbine [sic] on their heads
Look, pal, if you're going to walk around Manhattan with an engine spinning on the top of your head, you're just asking for it.

are the swedish people racists?
Gunnar Myrdal, please call your office. Oh, wait . . . you're dead.

columba bush and jeb bush divorce
This is the first I've heard of this, but then again, November 2 is more than three weeks away.

flight attendants overpaid bitch
Um, wrong, you snotty little off-price passenger. As I've noted here in the past, flight attendants are not only underpaid (See fourth item, "What Year is This?"), they are also too often utterly and thoroughly disrespected.

government promotional pictures on drink [sic] driving
The searcher's estimated blood alcohol level: 0.15 percent.

jessica savitch bizarre meltdown
Again with this one. Listen, readers, the only way to stop such queries is for someone to supply me with an MPEG or AVI file of this sad incident in the career of a woman I greatly respected despite her many flaws and misfortunes.

why is kareem so in love wit [sic] me?
Kareem is "in love" with you? Honey, you are watching way too much Lifetime TV.

self made millionaire, orphan at age 9, and u.s. president
Oh, cool! Trivia! I know this one. Do you?

Who was the child musical prodigy that asked his father for a violin when he was five years old and, when he was six, gave a concert with the Los Angeles Philharmonic Symphony Orchestra
Gee whiz, there's trivia and then there's trivia. Unless the searcher is searching for himself, I say: Get a life. Actually, no matter the circumstances, I say: Get a life.

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